I will never forget the first time I received a Brazilian wax. I won’t forget it because it hurt like a motha effin biatch. My feet were put in stirrups, the same ones that pregnant women put their feet in right before they give birth. My vajayjay and tush were completely exposed to a woman not in the medical field, which was just weird. Nah, the only job this woman had was to make me “sexy.” During the wax, she tried to talk to me about the weather and other bullshit in an effort to distract me from the pain…it didn’t work. When she was finished, I looked down to find a blood-red, bald vagina with tiny pieces of wax still present, a few little stray hairs still randomly sticking out, and tiny spots of blood. The wax lady informed me I could use a tweezer the get the stray hairs and that the swelling would subside in a few hours. I thought to myself, “This is what all the hype is about? What the fuck? This is sexy?” I told myself I would never get waxed again; I figured even shaving was better than this hell.
However, inspite of this rather traumatic experience, once I showered and the swelling went down, I kind of liked how I looked being waxed. Not only did I like it, I liked it a hell of a lot more than when I shaved. Shaving is counter-productive. Your peach only stays smooth for a day, after that, you have a prickly, stubbly, itchy, irritated vag and it’s so not cute.
I figured, I could endure the torture again if it meant I could have the vagina of a playboy bunny, but there had to be a less painful way. I did some research. And then I ordered numbing cream.
The next time I went to the wax studio, I was prepared. I applied numbing cream beforehand and took an 800 milligram Ibuprofen before the “procedure”. The problem with numbing cream is, you can only do the outside of your vagina, so though the pain wasn’t as bad as the first time, it was still a bitch. However, I continued to get waxed every 4 weeks for about two years. I even added my armpits to my waxing game. I had the application of my numbing cream as well as the perfect timing to take ibuprofen, down to a science. And still, each time it came time for my wax appointment, I became anxious and couldn’t wait for it to be over. But, I didn’t care because the second I started growing hair back, the faster I wanted it gone. By this point, I had become quite accustomed to being hairless and there was no way I was going to be seen with hair anywhere on my body, other than my head.
Over time, waxing did get easier, especially thanks to my handy dandy numbing cream. But then, something happened… I started getting a weird sensation from the numbing cream; my girly parts started randomly feeling numb on days I wasn’t using the cream. This scared the shit out of me. So, I stopped using the cream but continued to get waxed without it.
I was moving and due to go to Sweden very soon. Through moving, working crazy hours and getting family goodbyes in, I simply had no time to get waxed before I left. I was hairy and freaking out, but time simply wouldn’t allow me to get “sexified.” My boyfriend had told me many times that he didn’t care whether I got waxed or not, that I didn’t have to endure the pain for him. By this time, we had been together for almost a year, he loved me, so I figured, “Ok well he’s just going to have to deal with it this time. I’ll find someone to wax me when I get to Sweden.”
(Though, I didn’t get a Brazilian before I started my journey across the world, I did manage to talk my brother into waxing my armpits with his girlfriend’s at-home wax kit before my departure. A hairy vagina was one thing, but hairy armpits were another. He did a pretty good job. With that, I was off to Sweden.)
The tiny village I stayed at in Sweden lacked a waxing studio…along with a lot of other amenities. So my waxing appointment would have to be put on hold for a bit.
Then something unexpected happened. After being with my hairy kitty for a few weeks, I started to like it. Now, I must also mention, that I am currently on my journey to learning to love myself fully. And by this time, I had already stopped wearing makeup and was embracing my natural curly locks(the locks on my head, that is). But even so, it came as a surprise that not only had I started to embrace my vagina in its natural state, I actually started loving it…and even more than when it was waxed. I looked at it and I felt sexy. Sexy as fuck in fact. Not long after I felt this, my boyfriend admitted that he too liked it more natural. He called it “womanly.”
And then, something crazier happened. The hair under my armpits started growing back…and I didn’t quite give a fuck. I thought, “I may never wax or shave my armpits again.” Needless to say, that thought was one I never thought I would have.
So, what the hell changed?
During this journey, I asked a lot of questions.
If I feel sexy, why should I care what anyone else thinks?
Why shouldn’t I feel sexy in my natural body?
Why the bloody hell should I have to wax or shave?
Men grow hair on their balls and under their arms, why aren’t they expected to wax or shave?
Why are women expected to be hairless?
Do women in Europe wax or shave? Is this an American thing? Just what the hell is going on?
Is it really sexier to have your vagina look the way it looked when you were a child?(And who decided that?)
A lot of porn features hairless women, is that why it’s considered sexy?And hello, they so photoshop those chicks.
What has the porn industry done for the world anyway?
Women grow hair for a reason, why should I mess with what Mother Nature intended?
Who am I putting my body through torture for? For men? For my own vanity? For what exactly?
Does this make me a feminist? What is a feminist anyway? And why is feminism looked down on? Isn’t feminism just a movement put in place to give women equal rights?
Well shit, women have the right to be women, don’t they? And women grow hair in all the same places men do. If men can be men, women can be women.
The way I see it, leaving my body in the way it was intended makes me nothing but a woman. So yea, fuck it, having hair is womanly.
I got used to seeing my body in it’s natural element and I began to love it. This perception came through self love and acceptance. And I am so grateful that it did. Because now I never have to sit through someone ripping the hair from my perfectly beautiful body again.
P.S. I do trim. I respect that nobody likes hair in their food 😉